Bret Favre, Paragon of self centeredness

So let's see. Favre finally decided to stay retired yesterday. BUT WAIT! There's more! He told Steve Mariucci he'd be continuing to throw and work out. So... are you retired? Are you UN-retired? Are you a confused, narcissistic old bastard who needs the constant ego-feed of someone WANTING you? Now you're waiting to see who loses a quarterback early in the season so you can ride in on your white horse? I think I can safely say I speak for a LOT of NFL fans when I say: "Go home. Sit down. Shut up. Put your feet on the couch. Never open your stupid fucking mouth in front of a camera or microphone again."

This on again, off again (and again, and again) shit has to stop. You're making a mockery of yourself, the NFL, and you've derailed the chances of your (supposedly) good friend, Brad Childress, having a successful season with the Vikes. How is he now going to go tell his two quarterbacks remaining that he really thinks they can do the job this year?

Look, Brett. I know you've been the center of fucking attention for christ knows how long now, but your days are over. How about this? You go home, raise your kids, spend time with your wife, make your Wrangler commercials. Tell you what, I'll even BUY a fucking pair if you quit waffling and just stay fucking retired.

Michael Jackson dead

I remember growing up, seeing Michael Jackson and thinking "wow, this kid is good" That's probably my first recollection of MJ. He was supremely talented...

Ok, can we fucking let it go now?

Seriously, Michael "Pedo Bear" Jackson dies at age 50. Why does the world care so fucking much? you know who SHOULD care? the kids he molested, then paid off. They should care. The kids he invited to his amusement park, then got drunk, and molested...They should care. A bunch of grown men and women who have never EVER met him? YOU losers shouldn't. In fact, you need to take a look at your pathetic lives if you seriously think for one second that crowding outside the hospital matters one fucking iota in the grand scheme of things. Do you know what crowding around the hospital does? It makes it hard for people to get to work. It makes it hard for ambulances to get where they need to go. It inconveniences people trying to actually go about their lives. Are you people serious? go to work, or school, or go spend time with your family... hell go get a fucking happy meal, but for the love of god stop clogging the streets to pay your respects to someone you never met. Lets face it, the ONLY think MJ cared about in regards to you was:

A) are you buying his records
B) do you have any kids.

So you clog the roadways and hope to get on TV. Do you think the old, ugly white woman formerly known as Michael Jackson even noticed? Of course not.

Where's the public outpouring of affection for Ed McMahon? Farrah? They were stars, and neither of them was a child molester!

Mollycoddling, and the average parent

Ok, so we are now seeing high schools who refuse to name a class Valedictorian because they're afraid some student might feel inferior. What in the world is going on here? Have we gotten so intent on protecting our kids from reality that they no longer realize that anyone is better at something, ANYTHING, than they are? Does little Johnny think he's the best student in the class with his B- average, and we're afraid to disabuse him of that notion? How is that preparing your little angel for real life? What happens when little Johnny gets beat out for a job because someone is a BETTER candidate than him? Does he go home and cry to mommy, who visits the job site and talks to the supervisor until they BOTH get the job?

This is EXACTLY how we end up with situations like the English Singer lady on who couldn't handle the fact that she DIDN'T WIN, and had a nervous breakdown. Look, I'm all for protecting our kids to a degree. No one wants their kid to be wandering around on the roof blindfolded or some other such stupid activity. But we've gotten to where we insulate our kids from everything, including real life. Kids fall down, and scrape themselves. Sometimes, they break bones. Sometimes kids try to do things and actually FAIL. Insulating them from that fact is preventing them from developing the skills to deal with those failures later in life.

Not everyone can win, (please take note little league sports and sports parents). Not everyone can be the Valedictorian. In the words of Caddyshack's Judge Smails "Well the world needs ditch diggers too".